My well-used passport.

I applied for a new passport as my current one is full of visas and stamps. Of course, the holiday season has delayed the process. I leave for England on January 16. I’m getting a tad anxious. Anxious about the passport, and about British weather. Britain in winter is not the most ideal of Island Getaways.

I will have to travel with two passports (there isn’t a enough time to transfer my China resident permit into the new document). While colleagues have done this with no problem, I’m a little worried about being able to get back into China, using a permit in an canceled passport.

Of course, that is, if I have a passport at all and am able to leave the country at all.

From the customer service representative at the Canadian Consulate:

I’m sorry, we have no way of knowing when your passport will arrive.

The reply from the Canadian government Passport Status Request web form:

We would like to inform you that any questions concerning your passeport (sic) application should be directed to the Canadian Government Offices located in China. We hope we were able to assist you.

No, you weren’t able to assist me. Given my past experiences with the offices of the Canadian government in China, I shouldn’t have expected anything more. Please, dear friends, cross your fingers, and toes, for me.

Not as bad as Starbucks in the Forbidden City, but a close second. Don’t get me wrong, I like Ronald and his beefy friends, but there’s a proper place for everything. Shame on you McDonalds China. Tsk tsk.

Captured: October 24, 2008, Shenzhen, Guangdong Province, China.

There was a short break in the never-ending rain this week (above). Like all good things, it didn’t last. Last Friday the storm set a record, dumping more rain in one day than any in the last 50 years. The road outside my school flooded, denying access to the buses that ferry the students home for the weekend. They were not amused. A weekend at school, in class?

I am never without an umbrella.

From the CBC

Soldiers scrambled to shore up soggy levies with sandbags Tuesday in southern China as forecasters warned that heavy rain in the central region could trigger more flooding on the country’s second-longest river.

At least 63 have been killed in the past month, the official Xinhua news agency reported, noting that flooding has killed 171 since the beginning of the year.

This year’s flooding in 20 provinces and the western Xinjiang region has forced 1.27 million people to flee their homes, while crop damage was reported on nearly 1 million hectares, Xinhua said.

Read the entire story at CBC News.

While some countries are dealing with too much water other have enough to wantonly destroy it. From Canadian news:

CBC News has learned that 16 Canadian lakes are slated to be officially but quietly “reclassified” as toxic dump sites for mines. The lakes include prime wilderness fishing lakes from B.C. to Newfoundland.

Environmentalists say the process amounts to a “hidden subsidy” to mining companies, allowing them to get around laws against the destruction of fish habitat.

Under the Fisheries Act, it’s illegal to put harmful substances into fish-bearing waters. But, under a little-known subsection known as Schedule Two of the mining effluent regulations, federal bureaucrats can redefine lakes as “tailings impoundment areas.”

Read the entire story at CBC News.

Dear Andy:

I’ve seen a movie or two of your’s. More often than not I see your face plastered on every product you pimp endorse.

A trip to an electronic store has me facing your face, smiling at me from boxes of DVD players.

A trip to a DVD store has me seeing your viseage on the posters of the four movies you make each year. A tour through the CD section has me confronted with a mini you, in strange costumes, on CD jackets. I see a lot of you, Andy. You’re part of my weekly routine. A week without Andy…

I feel as if I know you, so I will say this:

You Cheap Bastard!

That’s right. You’re a cheap bastard. I read of your donation to the Chinese earthquake relief fund. Andy: 100,000 RMB? You have more than that in loose change. If you searched your sofa you’d find more money than that.

Come on, cheapie. Jackie Chan gave 10 million RMB. Jet Li parted with 1 million RMB and Yao Ming donated 500,000 RMB. The students and staff of my school donated more than 400,000 RMB. Let’s not talk about the $10 million RMB anonymous donation made yesterday.

You, tight-wad. 100 Gs?

$14,285 American for the young Chinese women that revere you? I know a Chinese English teacher that took the name Andi to honor you. YOU! Scrooge.

I’m not a man of your means, but after a day of phone calls I could donate 100 grand.

Yes, I’ve seen you face all over China. I never really liked it, my only reason being your blatant endorsements pimping. Now I have a reason. As does the rest of China. You have gone from a superstar to a laughingstock overnight.

Please, Sir, redeem yourself. Open your sock drawer, pull out your mad money, and take it to the nearest Red Cross office. Be the star in real life you are on the big screen.

SIncerely,

Sti Fu.

The Vancouver Sun printed an article about the outrage in China over comments made by a CNN commentator. The following is my letter to the editor of said publication.

Dear Editor:

I take issue with a statement made in your article:

China livid over CNN comments
Jack Cafferty criticized Chinese products, government
Aileen Mccabe, Canwest News Service
Published: Friday, April 18, 2008

Ms Mccabe said in her article: China Daily, the government’s official mouthpiece for the English-speaking world, revealed earlier Wednesday…..

Is “mouthpiece” an acceptable term to use when describing a newspaper? Should I refer to the Vancouver Sun as the official mouthpiece for Vancouver’s semi-literate?

Your lack of objectivity in this matter only exacerbates an already difficult and explosive situation. Perhaps your editors should edit for offensive terms as well as grammar before articles are published.

Sincerely,

The Stevo

Note: In my part of Canada, The Sun chain of newspapers is famous for their lurid stories.

Yes, following the lead of Wanda, Queen of Clad Rizzuto, I was banned from the Skinny Website. Join Wanda’s crusade, click the banner and fight the power!