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wonderful search terms

Fellow bloggers list their search terms from time to time. Stop; Wander often puts up a list, and David Rochester’ recent all-time best term has spurred me to publish some of mine. Over the last few months people have arrived from Google via ….

The Good

  • the fates
  • asian insults
  • bacon poisoning
  • cheese
  • equation humor
  • teacher marries china blog (you don’t marry China, China marries you)
  • chinese profanities
  • sadistic asian
  • i may be a little out of the loop too (aren’t we all)
  • kraft dinner pros and cons (there are no cons. KD is all pros)
  • i hate hong kong (me too)
  • small love test
  • fear of umbrellas
  • asian towel holders (is this a person, place or thing?)
  • old asian king on horse (never seen one. an old asian queen though…)
  • bruce lee

The Bad

  • working girls
  • my hot teacher (I really hope this wasn’t my students)
  • jackie chan mistress (not me)
  • cold shower
  • golden showers
  • thailand golden showers
  • asien golden shower

The Ugly (and strange)

  • feet
  • big feet
  • asian feet
  • asian elevator grope
  • asian over knee socks gallery
  • girls with big feet
  • ugly stockings
  • woman shoes off
  • asian woman who wear stockings
  • photos of my wife wearing stockings (my wife does not wear stockings)
  • naked feet women
  • asian cannibalism photo,picture

Yes, Asian Ramblings is a foot fetish blog masquerading as a China Travel blog. There, I’ve said it. I won’t lie any more. It’s a ingenious plan on my part. To what end? I haven’t the slightest.

Robin is the unofficial queen of foot fetishists. I wonder if her list is as interesting as this? I’m not even going to optimize this post for SEO. It will be our little secret, okay?

postscript: As I was writing this there was a hit from Google Images using the term “Big Feet.”

image from: Cindy and Jamie’s Wedding Day

Posted in Blogging, HumourComments (26)

weekly round-up

Ron Dubin's New Book

Ron Dubin's New Book

It’s been a busy week in the blogosphere, nearly as busy as real-life. I thought I’d share some good stuff found while perusing the intertubes.

Ron at rtd13.com has published a book of photographs from his Bolivian expedition. More info on this lovely tome will follow next week…

AOS at godlessromantic.com has some great dusk photographs posted. Definately worth a look.

Christine at almostfearless.com is giving away her American Airline miles.  American Airlines Can Bite Me - The Contest (It’s not Philippine Airlines, vast difference) gives readers a chance to win a free airline ticket. Christine will pick up the tab for the hostel. You must subscribe to her RSS feed to qualify.

Nomadicmatt.com has a great guest post by Lola Akinmade, editor of Matador Goods. Her tretise on how to photographing people offers traveling shutterbugs great advice.

amuirin at stop; wander has veered away from her posts about muppet sex and posted a great article on Accidental Photograph.

Travelblissful has a great post on Photoshop plug-ins for black and white images. This a great resource and worth checking out.

Heathenly is a very popular gal - follow her employment saga. Wanda continues to write letters to Orlando Bloom, discussing his career, or lack thereof. Kathleen has kicked off her new blog, on her own domain, at technoearthmama.com. Give her some love.

Congrats to Jeff at Lives of Wander. He was awarded his PhD. Carrie from myseveralworlds.com has a new job to add to her CV: She will be an editor with Live ABC.

Need a laugh? ProTraveler has posted an article about the 10 most Outlandish Asian hotels.

For those I left out, I apologize. Peace out as I start 7 days off. Sort of.

Posted in Blogging, Read ThisComments (8)

happy mid-autumn festival

Asians around the world are preparing to celebrate Mid-Autumn Festival aka the Moon Festival. September 14 will be the date for the 2008 festivities. The festival is popular in China, Vietnam, Korea, and other east-Asia nations.

I’ve talked about other Chinese holidays (Seven-Seven and the Dragon Boat Festival). The Mid-Autumn Festival originates from a folktale about a rabbit, an archer and his beautiful wife, immortality, and celestial bodies.

This is no simple holiday, like Christmas. There’s no man in a red suit giving you presents. It’s complicated stuff; you need Cliff’s Notes to keep the characters straight. Luckily, dear reader, you have an intrepid journalist deep in the heart of (south) China, willing to go to any length to get the skinny on this fête.

…there was an immortal named Houyi, part of the court of the Jade Emperor, the King of Heaven. Before they wed, Houyi’s lovely wife Chang’e, had been an attendant to the Queen Mother of the West (the Emperor’s wife).

Houyi the archer and Chang'e the lady on the moon.

Houyi the archer and Chang'e the lady on the moon.

The immortals, probably because they had little else to do (and bowling had yet to be invented) liked to squabble. Houyi somehow aroused the other immortals’ jealousy. Being petty, they slandered Houyi before the Jade Emperor. He and Chang’e were banished from heaven. The couple lived upon the earth and hunted to survive. Houyi became a famous archer.

In the days of yor, 10 suns circled the earth, a different one each day. Then: Catastrophe. All 10 suns appeared in the sky the same day. The earth was a mess. Crops were scorched, people received nasty burns (SPF ratings, like bowling, had not been invented yet) and without the invention of electricity there wasn’t a cold Coke in sight.

China’s Emperor Yao commanded Houyi to shoot down nine of the 10 suns, lest The Middle Kingdom be destroyed. Houyi, skilled bow-and-arrow dude that he was, complied and shot the fiery balls of gas from the heavens. The Emperor was pleased and gave Houyi a pill that granted eternal life, but warned the archer to fast and reflect for one year before taking it.

At home, Houyi hid the pill in the rafters and started to prepare himself as instructed. Enter Chang’e. She noticed a beam of light from the rafters and discovered the pill. Houyi returned and she swallowed the pill to mask her discovery. He wasn’t pleased, and berated her for her transgression. The pill had given her the power to fly, and that she did, into the sky. Her husband chased her until a strong wind forced him to return to earth.

Chang’e ended up on the moon. her flying powers spent. She coughed and half the pill fell from her mouth. She lived with the Jade Rabbit, that according to Chinese mythology, resides on the moon.  The rabbit, an apothecary to the immortals, was put to work trying to replicate the second half of the pill so she could return to earth.

The Jade Rabbit, resident of the moon.

The Jade Rabbit, resident of the moon.

Aside: There are many explanations for the rabbit on the moon. Some versions say Chang’e took the rabbit with her, another says the rabbit was already in residence, having been given a place in the moon palace after sacrificing himself for three hungry sages.

Somehow, Houyi built himself a palace on the sun. Once a year, on the 15th day of the 8th lunar month - Mid-Autumn Festival - he visits his wife, thus explaining the moon’s brightness on this day. Houyi was the yang (male symbol) and Chang’e, the ying (female symbol).

Trying to decipher this tale is difficult. In one version Houyi is a tyrant that saves the world from the suns and then takes the throne. He has his court wizards prepare a elixir of immortality so he can be king forever. Chang’e doesn’t like her husband’s despotic rule and steals the elixir so he can’t lord over his subjects for eternity. Another tale is similar to the story of Pandora’s Box.

Mid-Autumn festival is the second most important Chinese Holiday (Spring Festival, or Chinese New Year being the first). It’s a time for family reunions and a celebration of the harvest.

The food of the festival is the Moon Cake: Lotus seed paste wrapped in a thin pastry. Egg yolks or salted eggs are often the center of the cakes. It is a heavy delicacy, often eaten in small portions with tea.

From Wikipedia:
Traditional mooncakes have an imprint on top consisting of the Chinese characters for “longevity” or “harmony” as well as the name of the bakery and filling in the moon cake. Imprints of a moon, a woman on the moon, flowers, vines, or a rabbit may surround the characters for additional decoration.

Mooncakes are expensive and considered a delicacy, and production is labor-intensive and few people make them at home. Most mooncakes are bought at Asian markets and bakeries. The price of mooncakes range from $10 to $50 (in US money).

The holiday can be traced back to 1060 BCE, to the Chinese Xia and Shang Dynasties. It was during the Tang Dynasty (5th to 8th centuries) that it became very popular. With the recent change in national holidays, Mid-Autumn festival is now a day off. Previously it was celebrated but not granted “day off” status.

What do people for Mid-Autumn festival? Simple: Go to a restaurant or someone’s home. Eat a big meal, drink, and consume moon cakes. A less-than-reliable website has a different idea, it lists the following as the activities engaged in:

A mooncake - the food of Mid-Autumn Festival.

A mooncake - the food of Mid-Autumn Festival.

  • Eating moon cakes outside under the moon
  • Putting pomelo rinds on one’s head
  • Carrying brightly lit lanterns
  • Burning incense in reverence to deities including Chang’e
  • Planting Mid-Autumn trees
  • Lighting lanterns on towers
  • Fire Dragon Dances

I should be Wiki’s man on the ground. That list is not entirely correct.

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival. I’ll be thinking of you while eating moon cakes.

s

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Posted in Blogging, China, Cuisine, Culture, History, HumourComments (3)

bacon poisoning?

bacon.jpgIs it possible to die of bacon poisoning? This isn’t a question often asked. I may be the only person in the history of humankind to raise this query.

I love bacon. I ran gleefully home when my local store starting carrying the plastic-wrapped, fat-streaked, heart attack-inducing meat product. I cooked the entire ½ pound package of pork goodness and ate it all in one large sandwich.

Gluttony is a sin, but why one of the seven deadlies I’ll never know. I had a Jewish coworker at summer camp that ate bacon like a hungry savage each time it was served. She knew it was her only opportunity to consume the smokey breakfast without religious stigma.

I did find this gem on an article entitled: Stop poisoning your sex life: minimize your intake of five kinds of food, and your beefsteak will continue to sizzle well into your adulthood.

1) Fatty meats: More bacon means less porkin’. Myth has it that gorging on red meat is manly, but fatty cuts of beef, bacon, sausage and full-fat luncheon meats can be wack for your wood. “Most men know that saturated fat and cholesterol narrow the arteries that nourish the heart and increase risk of heart attack,” Lieberman says. “But they also narrow the arteries that carry blood into the penis, which contributes to erectile dysfunction [ED].” These arteries, by the way, are some of the smallest and will be the first to jam up with plaque.

Perhaps I have evolved beyond the need for intimate contact with my wife. If we had children they would want to eat my bacon, leaving less greasy treats for me. How much is too much? Is it possible to OD on bacon, requiring medical intervention? Is bacon poisoning a possibility? I don’t know. A quick search of Google pointed to some pages regarding traditional food poisoning, as well as illness induced by nitrates and a nasty host of bacon’s chemical companions. I’m too lazy to dig into the matter fully. I’ll consider myself a case study. When I find myself in a Chinese ER, sweating pork fat, the truth will be known.

Posted in Blogging, Cuisine, Photographs, Photography, ReflectionsComments (16)

friday round-up

It’s Friday morning in the Middle Kingdom. I’m off to Hong Kong to pick up my new axe.

I’ll be staying in palatial cheap basic accommodations. My last trip to HK saw me staying at the YMCA. I don’t know what reputation The Y has in other parts of the world, but in HK it’s bomb diggity.

envelope - http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7428937.stm

I’ve found some cool new blogs this week (well, new to me) and wanted to share. Give these folks a read, they have something interesting to say.

I mentioned Christine at almostfearless.com earlier in the week. She has a great post about how to receive your mail, in a virtual sense, while overseas.

Julie at Collazo Projects has an interesting piece on flubbed journalistic endeavors and gives her commentary on the Ann Curry/Ingrid Betancourt interview.

Want to do cool, free stuff in Boston? World-traveler extraordinaire Nomadic Matt has the answers in a recent post.

Theresa and Jeff of Livesofwander.com are leaving for a year of world travel. They have some interesting posts and neat things to say. Their site offers readers a chance to vote on where the couple should go on their epic adventure.

Signing off for the weekend. Stay chilly, I’ll try to stay dry.

Image courtesy of the BBC

Posted in Blogging, Read This, UncategorizedComments (8)

helping the (almost) fearless

Christine was a management cog in the corporate machine before she fled the Fortune 500 company that employed her and started life as a free-wheeling travel writer. Almostfearless.com documents her transition from one life to another. From her about page:

I always wanted to travel the world. Who doesn’t? But somehow I ended up trading in my 20’s for a job I didn’t love, money I didn’t need (but happily spent on things I didn’t need), and a burgeoning sleeping problem. One night after I ran out of valerian root and melatonin, I stayed up all night looking through job listings in my field. I realized something—I didn’t want to do any of them. None. I could change my job, change my environment, but the work itself had become excruciating.

almost fearless image

It was time to take the leap and start over. I would finally pick up that writing career I had been tinkering with for several years. I would get serious about my photography. My husband and I would sell everything and move abroad with our two dogs (Molly and Jack). What’s the worst that can happen?

As The Stevo is a good bloglleague, he’s contributed a little something to almostfearless.com. Christine has been busy these past two weeks, moving to Spain. Take a boo at my article on How to Breeze Through Customs.

Give Christine some love, she’s a brave one.

Posted in Blogging, Non-FictionComments (3)

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The Countdown

  • Off to London:
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Guest Posts

Asian Ramblings wishes to thank those fantastic writers that have filled the void created by Stevo's absence.

amuirin at Stop & Wander

Matt at Nomadic Matt's Travel Site

aos at Godless Romantic