Archive | April, 2008

may day, doctors, desks, and randy chefs

It’s nearly May 1st. In my part of the world that means it is International Labor Day. I wrote a post about this holiday a year ago. Take a look if you dare.

Labor Day used to constitute a 5-day holiday in China, three days being official and two optional to encourage tourism. It was a dandy break, half way through the school term. The government revised the holiday schedule, moving to a more Canadian system of long weekends, much to my chagrin. We now have three long weekends, one in April, May and possibly June (or September, no one seems to know). Folk festivals that were never official now enjoy mythical Day Off status.

I have been trying to take day off for two weeks. My three requests for leave were all approved, and yet I have found myself in the office each day I am suppose to be absent. Why? Loyalty, I guess. Fear, perhaps. I could leave but I worry about the store being properly minded in my absence. And, a series of misfortunes required me to stay each of the days I had booked off.

Stevo no needThe Stevo has a little problem that requires a medical consultation in Hong Kong. Doctors in China are educated and efficient, but hearing that my problem stems for hou chi, or having too much fire within my body, is not a diagnosis I can readily accept (could you?). It’s a male-only problem, and not a serious one. No, it can’t be solved by taking a blue pill. Don’t think that way about The Stevo. His hormones are that of a young and randy buck.

Again, I digress.

One of my holiday days will be spent in a doctor’s office in Hong Kong. How much does that suck? I could be seeing China’s glorious landmarks, or chasing Mrs. Stevo around our small apartment with a potato-masher, playing randy chef and reluctant waitress, or, drinking beer, watching DVDs and sleeping. But nay, I will be poked and prodded in a city I despise nearly as much as Winnipeg.

Is it fitting that I am seeing a doctor during the Labor Day holiday, given that I had booked off work earlier to do so? Ironic? Loyal? Stupid? Both? Neither?

Meh.

My other May Day project is this:

Stevos Big Desk

The Stevo bought a massive desk, so large that it is nearly the width of the apartment’s main room. Why, you ask? Is The Stevo an impulsive buyer? Does he like big things? Does he have a brain in his head?

Sometimes. Yes. Opinions vary.

I measured the apartment and designed a floorplan. Said ginormous desk should fit. Yeah, should. I should never use the word should: Things don’t go well when I do.

Oh, yes: Why I bought the desk. The Stevo’s male problem is exacerbated by his current desk and the contorted posture he must assume to use it. He hoped with a new, larger desk, said problem, and his demeanor, might improve.

Only time will tell. Or I will tell time. Yeah, I’m rambling. I’m out of blogging practice, and it shows.

Happy Labor Day. That cursing you think you hear is me trying to fit the desk into the spot I thought it would fit into.

Long live the revolution.

Posted in China, Culture, Holidays, Hong Kong, Humour, UncategorizedComments (9)

experimentation

Oakley Sunrise

The sunrise from my 5th floor perch, my lens through the lens of Oakley sunglasses. I’ve always liked to wear Oakleys, they are very cool. I never thought they would make a great photography accessory.

Posted in China, Images, TravelComments (9)

stockings that make my eyes bleed

There’s a disturbing Chinese fashion I must share with the world at large: Ankle-high stockings. (Mrs. Stevo calls them skin socks. After seeing this photo my sister will ask to have a few pairs sent to her.)

They’re not socks or stockings, but some evil eyesore combination (see image above).

This has bothered me for some time. I’m sure they serve a purpose (keeping your feet clean inside your shoes is how Mrs. Stevo explains it) but the butt-ugliness of them is an aesthetic assault upon my well-developed, keen, fashion sense.

There are few things as disturbing as seeing a beautiful Chinese woman, with shiny black Asian hair cascading down her back and a colorful frock on her small frame, wearing these stockings. It wrecks the whole fantasy look. There was a post on another China blog some time ago, the blogger said his reasoning for dating a particular Chinese woman was the fact she went barefoot instead of wearing skin socks. That is dedication, or insanity. Using that criteria the blogger would have few dates. Mrs. Stevo brought home “skin socks” when we started dating. After my temper-tantrum pleas she started wearing normal socks.

I won’t go into my feelings about the women that wear the above stockings with sandals and consider that appropriate attire. This could all be related to the many most Chinese people need glasses.

note: I will delete all comments that support the ankle-high stocking camp. I can do it, I have the power. This is a rant, not a debate.

another note: I am copyrighting Mrs. Stevo’s term, Skin Socks. PayPal me a quarter each time you use it.

Posted in China, Culture, HumourComments (15)

my letter to the editor

The Vancouver Sun printed an article about the outrage in China over comments made by a CNN commentator. The following is my letter to the editor of said publication.

Dear Editor:

I take issue with a statement made in your article:

China livid over CNN comments
Jack Cafferty criticized Chinese products, government
Aileen Mccabe, Canwest News Service
Published: Friday, April 18, 2008

Ms Mccabe said in her article: China Daily, the government’s official mouthpiece for the English-speaking world, revealed earlier Wednesday…..

Is “mouthpiece” an acceptable term to use when describing a newspaper? Should I refer to the Vancouver Sun as the official mouthpiece for Vancouver’s semi-literate?

Your lack of objectivity in this matter only exacerbates an already difficult and explosive situation. Perhaps your editors should edit for offensive terms as well as grammar before articles are published.

Sincerely,

The Stevo

Note: In my part of Canada, The Sun chain of newspapers is famous for their lurid stories.

Posted in Activism, Utter CrapComments (2)

i dare ya!

I spent last Friday afternoon doing laundry. While shuttling loads between the bedroom hamper and the balcony, I spotted something curious. Children are not curious, they are everywhere. My community has a population of 50,000 people. When annoyed I believe 95 % of the residents are screaming children.

The open space in my area of the development hold a garden, complete with a moat-like thing. A cleaner dredged the water weekly. Water, like fire, holds a never-ending fascination for kids. I watched a group of friends try to jump the moat. They raced toward it, and stopped dead before the jump. All took a turn, goading each other, saying, I’m sure, “I dare ya,” albeit, in Chinese.

I did what any responsible blogger would do: I grabbed my camera. I apologize for the quality of said pics. There’s a vast difference between my $400 zoom lens and the $1200 zoom I want, both in quality and price.

Approaching the moat, full speed. Read the full story

Posted in China, Humour, Images, TravelComments (6)

remains of the storm

Typhoon Neoguri (okay, Tropical Storm Neoguri) rolled through southern China over the weekend. I like a good storm as much as the next guy, but Neoguri wrecked my travel plans. I was supposed to spend two nights in Hong Kong, and had a full dance card of famous sites to shoot. I sometimes think Mother Nature is conspiring against me. Maybe next weekend.

The above was captured Sunday morning, April 20, after most of the storm had moved along, intent on harassing those further north.

Posted in China, Images, Travel, WeatherComments (3)